Overall returning to Bristol and moving into a flat has been awesome! At times I do miss the caravan, but I know this is the right place for us. However, there are a few downsides to get used to; council tax, electricity bills, landlords, only 4 pictures per wall! All of these I have gotten used to and am happy to deal with in return for being back in Bristol. However, there is one that continues to bother me; Neighbours.
Our flat is one of 8 in an old town house. I understand that people make noise. My husband and I aren’t angels that float, and Remy comes with his noises, obviously. I have come to terms with the pitter patter of footsteps and the fact that our neighbours above don’t seem to be able to hold on to anything (constantly dropping things). But there are two things that still grind my gears about the neighbours. The first one is television. The second is smoking.
My husband and I decided to continue living without a television. We didn’t have one in the caravan or boat, so why would we need one now? I can easily do without the mindless flicking and the seduction of trashy programmes. I adore living without a television. We still watch DVDs and enjoy the occasional series binge, but we don’t rely on TV for our entertainment or stress relief. What has come to light since moving into a flat is that we are in a minority. From where we are placed in the flats, we can always hear a television. It could be much worse; abusive arguments, or raging parties on Monday nights (both of which we’ve experienced before). The mumbles of the TV no longer wind me up as much as they did. But it’s the volume that irks me. You may enjoy watching violent police shows, but I don’t need it to interfere with my evening. Our neighbours below have their TV insanely loud and the door open! We’ve been woken up by car chases! (A whole blog on televisions and the overwhelming part they play in lives later. I have much to share.)
The second I mentioned was smoking. Our neighbours below smoke. Now this is a very bold statement that I am about to make; I believe smoking is one of the most selfish and privileged acts you can partake in. You are paying to slowly kill yourself and imposing your filth on others. I understand this is a bold statement. I have many friends that smoke, and I adore them all. But it is still a selfish habit. I understand it’s an addiction, but we’ve all met people that have quit. There is no excuse for smoking anymore. We have been blessed with beautiful sunshine recently. Which means we have the doors and windows open all day. This means that the fumes from our neighbours smoking comes into our home. I have asthma which is affected by cigarette smoke. Why should we be affected by their habits? But where else can they go? It’s their home, their garden, that means they can do as they like. Surely?
What the television volume and smoking signal to me is a lack of awareness. This is the bigger picture. The volume from the televisions above and below mean that sometimes we are woken up by car chases and canned laughter. I understand that cities are noisy. Right now sat in our flat (in a very quiet area of Bristol) I can hear a lawnmower, gulls, cars and the murmur of a television. I like a bit of background noise, I think it prevents loneliness. My frustration comes when I feel that others are being inconsiderate. That’s when I have a serious problem. I exhaust myself daily thinking of how my actions will affect others. Right now I have an intense stick burning and the window is open. I know my neighbour is in her garden. What if she doesn’t like Nag Champa? What if it brings back bad memories of a trip to India? Oh my God, I must stub it out! This country is getting fuller and fuller with loads of different personalities, habits and priorities. This won’t become a problem if we all become a little more aware of how our actions affect others. Especially in cities, where we are up close and personal all day. The world would be a much kinder and cleaner place if we took a little extra time to consider others. “Oh look, it’s midnight. My neighbours directly above me might be asleep. Maybe I shouldn’t blare my action film quite so loud”… For example!
There are many contributors to selfish acts. Stress and technology being two of the main ones, and these can both be linked to addiction. I know plenty of people that are addicted to stress, and in turn are addicted to technology to numb the moments of calm. By eliminating or lessening these elements we’d all have much more time and energy to care for ourselves and others. I know it’s easier said than done… actually no, I take that back. I’ve done it. My husbands done it and there is nothing special about us. It’s about choice and choosing to do things differently. I was someone that adored TV. I watched it so much. At times half of my day was filled with watching TV. I thrived off being busy and stressed. But now, since learning to live in the caravan, I’ve come to adore living at a slower pace. No one can force me to go faster than I want to. When we move slower we can look after ourselves and consider those around us.
I will continue to move slowly and consider those around me, in the hopes that it rubs off on other people.
Home not a Holiday 